I’m so happy for you

January 11, 2012

Day 10

No really I am. I just love congratulating people on their success. Don’t you? Comparing my failure to their victory. Why as humans does jealousy overwhelm us when we aren’t the ones basking in praise. Why does it feel so unnatural to be so genuine? Lack of self confidence? Would I be jealous of someone being a world famous pie eater? No. Well how famous would it make them? It’s not really strangers we are jealous of but people that are close to us, ones that we should be happy for. I can own how I feel, but I don’t want to feel this way. I want to be overwhelmed with joy for someone’s hard work and effort finally paying off. I mean I’d want the same from them. Well they can be a little jealous. Why don’t we seem to mind if people are jealous of us? We almost hope that they are. Isn’t that why we talk about ourselves? Post stuff on Facebook? I’m in hawaii, look at the celebrity I just met, look at my engagement ring. Aren’t you jealous?

This undeniable jealousy doesn’t show up with just other’s business success, it could be anything from having nice clothes, popularity, beauty, getting into a nice college, level of degree, even who you are dating. Everyone should know by now that your single friends have no interest in hearing about how amazing your new boyfriend is… “Omg he’s like a mix of James Franco, Ryan Gosling, and Jesus. I love him sooo much. I can’t wait for you to meet him.” Then secretly you hope his face pops up on the local mugshots. Phhh looks like Jesus has a little problem with angel dust.

Jealousy. It’s such a wasted feeling. I would love to win a grand slam, Oscar, Nobel peace prize, the presidency, but I don’t feel jealousy towards these people. Also, the feeling doesn’t arise with people I just met. For some reason it’s people I’ve known a while… like high school or younger. I feel like I’m behind in my timeline, but as long as everyone else I know is too then it’s ok. I think I know why I think that way. If someone from the same town, similar situation, same amount of time on this earth has done something with their life and I haven’t it’s my fault. They didn’t have an unfair advantage, but instead made different decisions. Better ones? Well for that moment it feels like that. You must have made the wrong life decisions and if you had just done more you could have experienced success, popularity, nice clothes, love. Where did I go wrong?

As jealous as I could be I don’t want to trade lives with anyone. Well…maybe… nah. Whatever they did to get to where they are has made them who they are. Same goes for me. I wish some of my circumstances were different, but I don’t want anyone else’s journey, struggle, mistakes or whatever it took for their success. I’ll just have to get it on my own terms. So some day I’ll share my success with you and if you are jealous its ok I won’t judge you.

Oh before I forget my sister did the makeup for an amazing moc-commercial done by the talented Jesse Rosten. Make sure you check it out, it’s going viral. I’m soooo happy for them. No really I’m promise. Oh so proud of my sis. This blog is in no way related to their recent success.

Fotoshop by Adobé
from Jesse Rosten on Vimeo.

It’s great huh? …jealous?

Hey sis how do you like my new nail polish?

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